Another year has passed, and that means it's time to look back on the old friends we've lost here at Audience of Two. We've got a lot to get through here, people, so let's make this quick.

ELLA PHYLLIS PICKLEBERRY, 86
Old Lady, Author

Beloved figure Ella Phyllis Pickleberry, author of such works as "The Secret Ingredient is Train(s)", of unnatural causes. She is survived by her sister/arch-nemesis, Edna Mae Pickleberry, author of such works as "The Secret ingredient is Murder!"


HORACE KING, ??
Hobo

Horace the Hobo King, subject of a three-part series (1-2-3), of causes related to ingesting a poisoned dust egg, administered by a giant dust bunny.¹


SHERYL CROW, 43
Ao2 Contributor, Musician

Sheryl Crow, run over by a bicycle.²


RANGER JOE, 44
Ranger, blogger

Ranger Joe, missing, presumed dead?


DOUG DISZ, 8
Sad kid

Local moody kid Doug Disz, run over by an ice cream truck.


"SIDEBURNS" MICKEY McCOY, 54
World-renowned Expert in Street Justice

International badass "Sideburns" Mickey McCoy, murdered by Pinky Bugstasher. His dying words: "Now that's some street justice!"


FLIP DIXIE!, 28
Obituary writer

Despicable collaborator Flip Dixie!, fatally stabbed with a pencil by Vera Quackenbush.

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¹POSSIBLE CORRECTION: The dust bunny may have been Horace in disguise, while the victim may have been a giant dust bunny in disguise.
²ELABORATION: A fictional bicycle, resulting in a fictional death.

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Vera Quackenbush is the co-author of such books as "Boutros Boutros Who?," "Everyone's Favorite Grammatical Jokes," and "Murder She Wrote: Why I Killed Flip Dixie!."